Thursday, August 26, 2010

Top 5 Ways To Suck Up To Your Professor

5. Sit In The Front

You should be the little girl in the yellow dress
This one is pretty self explanatory. You sit in the front, the professor sees and remembers you. You sit in the back with your computer open, they never even know you were there. Furthermore, every professor is automatically thinking that all the slackers of the class are going to sit in the back, so in order to steer clear of that stereotype, your going to want to sit as close to the front as possible .

4. Answer Every Question

You may not make many friends doing this, but you gotta do what you gotta do. The next time that deafening silence blankets the classroom right after a question is asked, chime in with an answer to save the day. Even if your unsure that your answer is correct, the professor will see your trying effort as you at least "attempting" to learn the material and better yourself in the class.

3. Go To Their Office Regularly

Going by your professors office lets them know you care. For some reason meeting with them three hours a week just isn't enough; so suck it up and make a little time between classes to go by and ask questions about something relevant to the class. Just make sure you have something to talk about before going in because don't want to look like a creeper just standing there with nothing to say.

2. Kiss Ass On a Daily Basis

"You went camping with your two children and pregnant wife and everyone got food poising from eating bad berries, that's SOOOO interesting, Tell me more!!"

Everyone loves to hear themselves talk and if you want to get on the professors good side, your going to have to struggle through those boring ass stories like a Champ. Remember, YOUR GRADES AT STAKE HERE!!!

1. Have "Relations" With Them

Hey, somebodies gotta say it. I mean, who's gonna fail a boyfriend/girlfriend? Nobody, that's who! The only problem with this approach is that you better be in it for the long haul. Make the mistake of breaking it off mid-semester and your damn sure getting an "F" for that class, Guaranteed!