Monday, September 6, 2010

7 Ways NOT to Get Arrested at a Football Game

Never Wear the Away Teams' Colors in the Home Teams' Student Section
No matter how many people you're "cool with" from the Home Team, you're not cool with everyone. Showing up in the student section with the Away Teams' logo across your chest is just asking for an ass kicking . If you must have on your teams logo, wear a hat; maybe they won't notice.

DON'T Talk to the Cops.....EVER
Good rarely comes from talking to the cops at sporting event. I've seen people go up and say just three or four words, then seconds later have their arms wrestled behind them being carried out in hand cuffs. I know what your thinking too, "They can't do that, I have freedom of speech". Well, in the end, it's their word against yours, so who do you think the judge is going to believe? Best advice if you see one, keep your mouth shut. If they look your way, give a small nod of approval and just keep on walking.

Leave Your Airplane Bottles at Home
If I've seen it once, I've seen it a thousand times! Someone tries to be sneaky by pouring some liquor into their Pepsi and GETS CAUGHT. They then have to take that embarrassing walk down the stairs in the hands of a Police Officer who's holding the little airplane bottle above his head for everyone in the stands to see. Don't be an idiot, get your fill before coming in and just leave the rest outside.

If Your Too Hammered, Stay in the Parking Lot
If you can barely walk into the stadium, DON'T GO IN. Trust me, no one wants you there when your that bad off anyways. Just stay in the parking lot and keep on partying by the tailgate. You can always just listen to it on the radio. Walking in at your worst dramatically increases the odds of you doing something stupid and getting arrested.

DON'T Throw Things
No matter how ninja like your skills are, I guarantee the camera man from ESPN will just happen to be looking your way at that exact moment and everyone at home will have a clear view of you doing your dastardly deed. Never forget that there is always the possibility your actions will be caught on camera for the world to see.

Never Run Onto the Field
Being a 2010 ECU Alumnus, I know first hand what happens to people who run onto the field, even after a dramatic win. Let's Go to the Video Tapes.....

Stay At Home
Ahh, the best way to not get arrested at a football game is, of course, NOT TO GO!!! This is not directed at everyone, and isn't an avocation on my part for you not to support your team by screaming your head off in the stands. This statement is more directed to those who take the game just a little to seriously and can't control themselves when everyone else around them are just trying to have a good time. I think I speak for all of us when I say, STAY HOME!! You can yell at your TV all you want and no one has to hear it but you!